My damn econ final

Kind of based on a text conversation Gwen and I had

Andrew: I just finished my damn final

Gwen: Which final was that?

Andrew: My damn final

Gwen: What’s your damn final?

Andrew: Gwen no need for profanity, like I said my damn final. Damn as in Economics

Gwen: Oh your econ final

Andrew: That’s what I said! MY DAMN FINAL!

I guess 3266 spells both damn and econ and in my phone damn comes up first.

-Andrew

delicate constitution part 2: i've always had issues with my tongue

this blog is brought to you by the letter s

as a little girl I lisped. I also pronounced all of my r’s as w’s. this isn’t abnormal for children. since it didn’t go away by third grade, my parents decided to put me in “speech therapy.” a speech therapist employed by the school would drag me out of class and I would go to a little office to play games and work to pronounce all my letters properly. by the end of fifth grade, I was an excellent rummikub player and could successfully pronounce the letter r. by middle school, I was one of only two tweens in my class who still had to go to speech therapy because of my persistent lisp. it wasn’t at all traumatic, as the others never knew where I went and I was excused from gym on a weekly basis. eventually, the system gave up on my lisp and my inability to change. to this day, when angry or especially tired, I drop my r’s and my lisp becomes more pronounced.

on Tuesday morning I went to the dentist to get a cavity filled. I have very bad teeth. it is a legend in my family that my bad teeth are a result of my mother being pregnant with me in west germany during Chernobyl. Andrew and I haven’t had dental insurance since we got married, so we haven’t been the dentist in two years. when dental kicked in after working at the bureau for three months, I quickly made an appointment. Andrew was fine, but I had one cavity.

I strolled to the dentist Tuesday morning while listening to radio lab’s recent episode, “animal minds.” i ended up in the dental chair in a relaxed mood, thinking about how humans could communicate with whales. the dentist pulled up a chair and handed me sunglasses to “protect my eyes from the bright light.”

“wow” I thought. “that is really considerate.”

she began administering the anesthesia. almost immediately, my tongue began to go numb and the pinching, miserable pain in my jaw was echoed in my tongue.

“holy sh*t…it feels like she poked the needle through my tongue…”

after about thirty seconds, the pain became unbearable and tears began to stream uncontrollably down my face.

“don’t worry, I’m halfway through. I am going slow so it doesn’t hurt as bad.”

when she was finished, she began to put my chair back up right.

“wait, wait! I’m going to pass out! please put the chair back down.” it was so traumatic I almost fainted. which isn’t that abnormal, to be honest.

she continued on with the procedure, and I left the office an hour later.

by noon the anesthesia had worn off in my lips and jaw, and my tooth began to ache. weird, my tongue was still numb. by six pm, my tongue was still numb. by the next morning, twenty four hours after getting the anesthesia, my tongue was still numb!

I called the dentist. she didn’t speak to me. the receptionist informed me that it should wear off in about five days. I didn’t believe her, and looked it up online. that’s where I first heard about the sub lingua nerve and permanent nerve damage caused by dental work. I called my parents, and freaked out! they called their dentist, who remembered me and talked them through it. she most likely went through my sub lingua nerve, which is why the anesthesia was so painful. the pain was her damaging my nerve. if I’m lucky, it will recover in one to two months. if I’m not lucky, it could take up to two years.

it feels like I am licking a battery, or that there are little evil gnomes electrocuting the left side of my tongue every time I move it.

surprisingly, this makes me eat more. maybe chips will make it feel better. no? maybe chocolate. no? maybe mint chocolate. still not better…maybe a bratwurst. hmmm, still feels bad. I should drink a couple glasses of diet coke. nope, still hurts…hey, what about veggie straws? half a bag later, I feel like vomiting and my tongue still hurts.

delicate constitution

for the past few days i have had vertigo. the world keeps tilting on its axis and spinning slightly to the left. wtf?

in other news, i think i am going to sign up for a pottery class.

Happy Easter!

we had a wonderful easter potluck at our place sunday night. our friends barry and amelia hosted a delicious and beautiful potluck brunch earlier, and i was sort of hoping a more capable hostess would step up for easter dinner. but i wanted it too badly to wait, so i volunteered our place. it's at least big.

i had a ton of help from my friend eunice frying up about 5 lbs of tofu. that's a lot of tofu for those of you don't eat tofu. unfortunately, disaster hit when i realized we didn't have soy sauce. i was really convinced we did during the THREE shopping trips (without a car) i took to get food for sunday. but we didn't, so i ended up just putting a crap load of maple syrup in the orange glaze i put on the tofu. people said it tasted like "a tofu waffle." i guess that could be taken as a compliment...

we also had an easter family program. everyone talked about a day during holy week or another topic related to easter. it was wonderful. we learned about weird polish customs that include beating judas iscariot, we heard amazing easter vespers music, and even got a few mardi gras beads.

thanks to everyone who came. we had a great time and fell into bed exhausted from the fun, food, friends, and family program.

i was taking a bunch of pictures of the people at the party, when my friend's toddler (who gets his picture taken quite often) really got into having his picture taken. he kept saying, "again!" so i kept taking pictures of him. then he decided he wanted a turn. "my turn!" i handed over the camera, and he quickly became an expert. i showed him where the button was and he was taking pictures all by himself. i've decided to post the pictures andrew and i took, and then below that the pictures by our toddler friend.





pink cardigans





not as pretty as their wives

yes, my friends look like mermaids.

she is not a teenage mother.

andrew crosses his legs like a european.

we could fit twice as many people, if we found out a way to utilize our high ceilings.

liser!!

babies and beads! they kept trying to eat them.

green shirts.

"my turn!"

surprisingly, andrew is not the angriest person in this photo...

our artsy friends.

you can see me in this one.

the following are pictures taken by our toddler friend. the captions are written in his voice.

self portrait.

liser!!!

mommy!

i can only see faces if you are sitting. don't you get it yet? i am short...

i like to take artsy photos.

who's that?! dan! (this picture may have been taken by someone else...)

man that wears toys on his head! (ditto)

who's the real photographer here?!

my godparents!